← Back to two part-question essays
two part-questionModel Essay Answers

Official IELTS Writing Prompt

To what extent do you agree or disagree that sports should be a compulsory part of the school curriculum?

Band 9 ResponsePerfect Examiner Level

The discussion surrounding whether sports should be an obligatory element of the school curriculum has gained significant traction. While conventional wisdom favors prioritizing academic disciplines, I contend that mandating sports education is indispensable in fostering not only physical fitness but also critical life skills in students.

To commence, requiring sports participation is crucial in addressing the alarming trends of obesity and sedentary lifestyles among children. Regular engagement in physical activities has been shown to enhance cardiovascular health, promote mental well-being, and cultivate discipline. Schools serve as foundational environments for instilling these habits, and incorporating sports as a compulsory subject ensures that students appreciate the long-term health and social benefits it offers. By prioritizing physical education, educational institutions can play a transformative role in shaping healthier future generations.

Detractors of mandatory sports education argue for the supremacy of core academic subjects, suggesting that a concentration on subjects such as mathematics and literature is essential for career readiness. However, this perspective overlooks the intrinsic value that sports provide in developing teamwork, resilience, and leadership qualities—attributes that are increasingly sought after in any professional landscape. A balanced curriculum must not only equip students with academic knowledge but also prepare them for real-world challenges, making the inclusion of sports paramount in producing holistic individuals.

In closing, I firmly assert that the merits of integrating compulsory sports into the educational framework far outweigh the rationale behind prioritizing academic subjects. By enhancing both physical health and social competencies, a curriculum that encompasses sports can effectively prepare students for the multifaceted demands of contemporary society, establishing a foundation for a thriving, well-balanced future.

Word count: ~300 wordsFormatted strictly for standard IELTS margins

Examiner Rubric Breakdown

Task Response

9.0

This essay expertly addresses the prompt, showcasing a thorough examination of the issue with full nuance and depth. The arguments are intricately woven, demonstrating a comprehensive understanding of the topic, supported by compelling reasoning and real-world implications. The candidate's clear position is evident throughout, solidifying this response as a Band 9 level piece due to its sophistication and depth of analysis.

Coherence & Cohesion

9.0

The essay exhibits seamless coherence, with logical transitions and well-structured paragraphs that enhance the flow of ideas. Cohesive markers are utilized with finesse, establishing a narrative that guides the reader effortlessly from one point to another. This flawless progression aligns with the high coherence standards expected at Band 9, creating a highly engaging reading experience.

Lexical Resource

9.0

The vocabulary deployed here is both sophisticated and precise, featuring advanced terms such as 'intrinsic value,' 'obesity,' and 'transformative role.' The essay avoids redundancy and employs a rich variety of phrases, demonstrating the candidate's proficiency in language use that aptly reflects Band 9 characteristics. The lexical choices contribute to the clarity and depth of the arguments presented.

Grammar Range & Accuracy

9.0

The grammatical constructions utilized in this essay are advanced, featuring a multitude of complex sentences, accurate use of conditionals, and varied structures. There are virtually no errors present, which results in a highly polished piece. This level of grammatical accuracy and range is consistent with Band 9 expectations, further emphasizing the essay’s exemplary quality.

Why it deserves a perfect Band 9

This essay stands out as a model response due to its comprehensive approach to the topic, which is treated with full nuance and robust argumentation. Every paragraph contains tightly developed ideas, supported by effective reasoning and relevant examples. The use of sophisticated vocabulary and flawless grammar adds to the essay's exceptional quality, making it a definitive Band 9 answer. Moreover, the seamless coherence and logical flow encapsulate why this response exemplifies the pinnacle of IELTS writing.

Lexical Resource & Vocabulary Breakdown

Term / PhraseDefinitionExample in Sentence

inculcating

to instill an idea, attitude, or habit by persistent instruction.

The teacher is inculcating the importance of punctuality among her students.

holistic development

the process of considering the whole person and the development of both physical and psychological aspects.

Sports play a crucial role in the holistic development of children.

countermeasure

an action taken to counteract a problem or an undesirable situation.

Implementing physical education classes is a countermeasure against childhood obesity.

resilience

the ability to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness.

Playing sports helps students build resilience in the face of challenges.

transformative

causing a marked change in someone or something.

Education can have a transformative effect on a person's life.

Useful Collocations

mandatory participation

compulsory involvement in an activity.

Mandatory participation in sports fosters teamwork.

core subjects

the essential subjects in a curriculum that are considered critical for education.

Core subjects such as math and science are vital for academic success.

healthy habits

behaviors that promote physical and mental well-being.

Schools should encourage students to develop healthy habits early.

well-rounded education

an education that includes a variety of subjects and experiences.

A well-rounded education prepares students for various life challenges.

social competencies

the skills required to interact effectively with others.

Participating in team sports enhances social competencies.

Word Variety & Synonyms

Instead of: argue

contendassertclaim

Instead of: benefit

advantagegainmerit

Instead of: important

crucialsignificantvital

Common Pitfalls & Errors to Avoid

Candidate Error:

using 'their' instead of 'there' when referring to location

Correct Band 9 Option:

'there' should be used for location

'Their' is possessive, while 'there' refers to a place.

Candidate Error:

vegetable instead of 'vegetables'

Correct Band 9 Option:

Use 'vegetables' for plural form

The plural form is required in various contexts.

Candidate Error:

confusing 'affect' with 'effect'

Correct Band 9 Option:

'Affect' is a verb while 'effect' is a noun

Understanding the distinction is crucial for proper usage.

Senior Examiner Advice

In preparing for the IELTS Writing Task 2, it is essential to plan your essay effectively. Start with a clear understanding of the prompt and outline your main ideas before writing. Aim for a four-paragraph structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Make sure each paragraph has a clear focus and contributes to your overall argument. Use varied vocabulary to avoid repetition and ensure your word choices accurately convey your meaning. Practicing using a range of complex sentence structures will enhance your grammatical range. Lastly, time management is vital. Allocate sufficient time for planning, writing, and reviewing your essay to refine it for clarity and coherence. This approach will help you achieve a higher band score.

Ready to check your own band score?

Get instant, calibrated scoring feedback on your Task 1 or Task 2 essay in under 15 seconds. Try it out now for free.

Check Essay Free

Related Resources & Guides

Check Your IELTS Essay for Free

Submit your essay to our AI writing checker and get an instant Band Score, rubric breakdown, and vocabulary feedback.

Try Evaluator Tool